The date in the title of this post and the photo I have included are from a pivotal event for me.  It was this date, part of a three day weekend where I hit the lowest of the lows and also the date that got me to pick myself up by my boot straps and change the path that my life was on.  This day fell on a Sunday and at the time I worked three different jobs, worked a side gig and lived under the desk in the photo due to the fact that I was homeless.  The weekend started for me at 5pm that Friday when I finished my work at the CPA firm I worked for in the Stockdale Tower (In Bakersfield, CA) on the 6th Floor.  When I was done, I set the alarm for the office and locked it.  I got into the elevator, hit "B" for Basement, entered the Office that the owners of the building let me use and proceeded not to see or talk to another individual until the following Monday.

See this is the day I had a thought cross my mind that I had never thought would ever cross it...  "If I died right now, if I were to take my life right now.  No one would care or even notice..."  See the thing was that at this point, I was 33 years old, I had been working three jobs since I was 13 years old.  I had spent all of my twenties taking care of family (blood family), who by the end of 2011 bled me dry of money and got me evicted twice.  I left the public sector (High School District) and entered the private sector in 2005 working for a IT consulting business, was ripped off by the owner of that business by $60,000 (bought in as a partner and was later told it was a loan).  Lost my Father, started my own business in 2006 and lost it at the end of 2008 (I was small enough to not matter) went $260,000 in debt in the process.  Got laid off three different times.  All this work I nothing to show for it, I was homeless, no one had time for me outside of business.  The people who did, were mostly negative.  I was in a bad place.

The good news is that thought was only in my head for maybe five minutes and my response was "Fuck This"...  And I spent the rest of that night plotting what I was going to do to get myself out of that basement and change my path.  Here is what ended up being my mission and some of the things I had to learn...

• Cut Out the Negative People:  Believe it or not, you are not required to keep negative or toxic people in your life and yes this includes family.  I am not saying that if you have one argument with someone or they may be critical of some plan that you are thinking of that you need to cut them.  We are all individuals we are not always going to see eye to eye...  I am talking about those people that are constantly negative, toxic or do whatever they can to bring you down, and in their eyes you can never do anything right...  To those people, I say fuck'm.  They are not happy with that's happening in their life and they are trying to bring you down with them...  People that you allow in your life need to be Team You and you equally need to be Team Them..  Life is too short to deal with negative / toxic people.
• Let the Past be the Past:  Prior to this date I had a history of relenting over crap that happened to me in the past.  I allowed it to really shape how I conducted myself and I did a lot of woe is me.  I learned that I had to let the past stay in the past.  I am not saying to forget it as you must learn not to repeat it.
• Not Everyone is Going to Like You:  I am not claiming to be perfect but you could be the be the most perfect person on the planet and someone will not like you...  Just ask Jesus...  You do you, treat others the way you want to be treated and if thats not enough, you are never going to change them.  Work with them if you must, otherwise move on. And let the fact that they do not like you just roll off your back.
• There are Better Days Around the Corner: I was stuck in the moment and in that moment I didn't know that just two years later (first week of November) this crazy beautiful woman would become my friend and two years after that on November 4, I would find out I was a home owner and the very next day I would marry that crazy beautiful woman. 

The photo to the left, is a a picture I took about and hour or two before the thought of suiside passed through my head. I was browsing facebook and performing a data recovery of a bad hard drive for a costomer. The stack of bottles is a stack of Costcos version of 5-Hour Energy that the CPA Firm I worked for provided for staff. The desk is a desk I aquired from a Title Company that failed in 2008 in the Stockdale Tower. I slept under this desk for two and a half years.